After 30 months..

Hi :)

I hope everyone's Diwali went great! Mine was truly fantabulous!! Nothing was very special.. as usual lights and crackers.. the only thing special was my wonderful family!! Its great to be home.. I am sure.. a few people may have missed going home this Diwali. I was feeling really bad for Deepika.. I had to leave her alone at Gurgaon. But I know, she would have managed.. ;)

Things have changed a lot since I am in Gurgaon. Not at my home, but surely with me. People are same at home, things are same at home. The feel and smell of home is still the same. But surely, I have changed. One of my closest friends, wanted me to write on this. I believe, this thing is better noticed by people around.. who knew Nancy before and now. With this noble thought in my mind, I seriously asked my dad.. "Papa, have I changed a lot in past 30 months?" My dad replied.. "You should know better!! Check your weight now, compare it with 30 months before and you will realize!" and he giggled. I have gained.. and papa never miss a chance to remind me this. ;) :P So, yes! This is one of the major changes..

Other ones.. yes.. I never used to travel alone. I couldn't dream of even a 30 kms journey alone. And now, I travel like 70 kms daily.. for my workplace. I have to come to Jalandhar alone too. See, how Brave I have become ;)

I just could't say NO. I couldn't set my own priorities. I did not realize how I should work upon my own happiness. Now after these 30 Months.. I have learnt to say NO. I can see my priorities. I almost know how can I be happy. And I know who is actually important for me.. and who is not. I can speak out what actually my heart means. I have become stronger emotionally. May be, environment in my home town was so nice.. I never knew I need to be tougher. So, now I am pretty strong. Yes, betrayals hurt now too. But the difference is in coming out of them. My expectations have reduced drastically. I am glad.

I was on a pocket-money. I was a graduate. After 30 months, my family and God ji have made me capable enough of earning. Yes, this is indeed a very big change. Handling money is not as easy as it seems. People like me, who are away from home and have started earning suddenly are generally not able to manage it. You can say, I am blessed! I am able to manage money.. thoda-bahut ;) :P

There might be many changes more.. may be I can't figure them out. It would be so good if my readers who know me can share.. I will add them up too! ;)

Ciao.. Keep Smiling!! :)

Opinion? or Backbiting??

I was wondering why people like talking about others a lot? Is it that their life is not at all interesting, and hence they need some X, Y or Z to talk about? I am using pretty nice words (talking about others) here for backbiting and bitching actually. A few of my readers who indulge in this may not like, or even may hate my post.. but still this is what I actually think.

I got to know a few people commenting on what kind of a person Nancy is. I can estimate out of those, 99.9% comments on me would be the distorted truth. Yes, I am calling the mirchi wali gossip as ‘distorted truth’. The rest 0.1% would be those, who actually know me. I still don’t know, why am I given that much importance over others.. as in.. why am I the privileged one?? The topic of discussion?? Is your own life so boring, that you can’t even talk about it?? Whatever.. it is a democratic country.. n yes, we are ‘free’ to express our opinions. But try and kind of avoid speaking shit about others without full information. Yes, yes!  You have got full rights to can hate me for this post, but this is what I actually felt!!

As, the idiom says, ‘All that glitters is not gold’. So, it will not be good for me to blame anyone. It’s just that I wish people could think and then speak. Presumptions are not always true. At times, whatever we see with our eyes is not always true. But we humans are kind of structured in this manner. We tend to trust our eyes, more than our instinct. I would surely prefer following my instinct. I believe, good instinct usually tells you what to do long before your head has figured it out!! But we wait for our head to speak something, and in that waiting, we are too late! I am also not very sure.. whether which one of these will be giving the positive results.. but still I don’t want to be late atleast... I am actually falling in love with this full of surprises life.. :)

Ciao.. Take Care.. Keep Smiling!! 

Love is in the air ♥

Helloz.. 

Now, after around 6 months of my post graduation.. I am seeing many engaged couples around, who were once 'In a relationship' in college. People actually, moving seriously towards accepting each other forever and ever and ever. It’s a beautiful thing actually to accept someone so completely. Yes, once you change your relationship status from 'In a relationship' to 'Engaged' or may be to 'Married”, you just cannot go back. I am surrounded by people madly in love.. who really want to be with each other for the rest of their lives. I somewhere find it a herculean task actually. I don’t think someone would be able to tolerate me forever!! I am a difficult person.. and so.. many of us are. But, I am sure, when we decide to be with someone, we accept everything! Everything here means, positives, negatives, neutrals.. everything! At times, a word called adjustment comes into play. I personally feel.. this adjustment should be replaced with unconditional acceptance. Life would seem simpler and sweeter. :)

As per Hindi movies, you can’t forget your so-called first ‘love’. I said 'so-called', coz at times, you yourself do not know that is it really love? or just a liking.. or many be infatuation. It is also said, Love never changes.. I am not actually very much in favour of these statements. I have people around, who were not very successful in their first relationships.. and have moved on and are living a great life. And for some, the first relationships were so painful, that they have literally started hating the other person. This is how, Love converts into Hate. How can this happen? I find it so weird. But then, yes, it does happen.

What do we all want in the end? A hand to hold for the rest of the life, a shoulder to lean on whenever you feel like, someone to share the actual ‘us’, somebody who can understand each and every bit of us… someone.. who can claim the complete right on you.. who can make you feel complete! It is as simple as that, a few emotional needs. It is also, as complicated as it can be!!

Just ‘being what you are’ makes things easier. There is nothing better than ‘being loved for what you are’!! Why do people try and pretend to be someone else? Why don’t people actually say what they are? Why do people do not speak their heart out?? Trust me; doing all this is a necessity for everything to be true!!

And yes, I am coming across a few compliments.. with people waiting for me to write again. I am truly thankful to you all for appreciating me. Thank you so much for reading.. :)

Ciao.. Take Care! Keep Smiling! Be yourself!! :)

There is only one success – to live your life, your own ways!

Each and every one of us is striving for success, spending enormous hours in a day working for this. I have people around me who work like anything for their one goal – Success! The meaning of this word surely would vary from individual to individual. For some money, for some fame, for some calm mind, for some ‘attaining salvation’, I believe it can be anything under this earth!

And for people like me, the only success is ‘to live my life, my own ways’. Being an independent human being, with an independent mind, I truly believe I have the right to live my life, the way I wish too. I really admire the care of my loved ones. But all fake care over and above this is not tolerable at all. I do not really want to be irritated by interference. Another point which I was thinking of, many a times, people so want to do something, but do not do it! Reasons – Society, what would people say!! I really wonder, in such so busy world, how and why people get some time to talk about others.

At times, our own apprehensive approach becomes hurdle in doing the right things and right time. I truly don’t know what is right or what is wrong. These days, I am just doing what I feel like and I am really loving it. It feels so good .. I am not being apprehensive for anything, may it be me or people around me. ‘Wow’ feeling…!! :)

Try doing what you wish to do, speak out, don't care about the irrelevant people!! In one word, "Live".

Take Care Guys!! Keep Smiling.. Ciao  :) :) :) :)

Day 1

Day 1 of everything is so difficult and full of surprises. Isn’t it?

When I had to go to school, I was timid. I can’t clearly remember how my Day 1 went, but it was one of the most dreadful feelings. I was too afraid for everything which is coming to me. As time passed, the days went on, after few days, things seemed so normal to me. Coz a human inculcates that ‘habit’ of doing a particular thing. Similarly, day 1 of graduation was also full of surprises, excitement. One of the reasons was a sudden shift from a co-ed environment to only girls environment. ‘New people’ add to all this.

Then, for Post Graduation, Day 1 at new city, a sudden shift from a familiar city of Punjab to unfamiliar part of NCR. Again, meeting new people. I must say the probability of meeting wrong people increases, the wider your purview becomes. It was pretty easy to trust everyone in KG, isn’t that? And this ‘trusting everyone’ reduces with time. At least with me, it happened. With time, you come to know what kind of people you like to be with. But then, possibility of meeting them is not very high. Whenever you meet them, never ever lose them! Grab them.. and keep them close to your heart! Life will seem wonderful. And when they are along, the Day 1s also seem beautiful, very beautiful. I am glad I have such people around.. :)

Take Care! Ciao.. Keep Smiling.. !! :)

Some bits and pieces..

Hellozz...

It’s been a long time; I have not used my words in writing this post here. It’s been quite busy, with new work and new people. A few things happened since I wrote my last post.

Finally, my bestest buddy was able to find out some time for me to watch ‘Bol’, was waiting for long for it.

I have got some more and important work at office.

I am knowing someone and finding that God has already sent my Xerox here before sending me.

 

I need to shift to another place, from a PG to a rented place. Planning this is so very painful, God knows what happens with the implementation. My mom is so worried and I am worried coz she is getting worried.

I am trying my best to convince her that I am not the little irresponsible one now. I am able to manage the things, believe me I am grown up. I have learnt from her, from life and from each and everything around me. As all mothers are, my mom is worried too.  If possible, she would come here, leaving all her work, just for me to settle down. I understand her situation so clearly, and I understand her unconditional deep love for me. I hope things go well.

Another thing, I have a confession. I am terrified to confess my voice rises quite soon, when I talk to them, on whom I believe I have full right, special people in my life!! But I do not want to do that. I read somewhere, “Never raise your voice, just increase the quality of your argument.”  I so very much want to do that. But in that argument, voice increases, even if there is enough of the quality. I am terribly sorry for doing so!! Would leave now.. 

Ciao.. Keep Smiling !! 

'Hindi Diwas' or Hindi Day??

Hi.. I hope you guys are doing pretty well.

Whenever I think of writing a post here, I don’t have anything on my mind. And when I have many things on my mind, I don’t have words to express. It’s been such a boring week till now. My mind is freezing to a stage.. I don’t even know what actual word I should use for this situation. Feeling like stuck somewhere. Uff.. I don’t know!! Really need a good weekend!!

Now, moving on to what I wanted to talk about.. ‘Hindi Diwas’.

It was yesterday, when I was motivated somehow, to change the language of my Facebook page to “Hindi” on the occasion the ‘Hindi Diwas’. After googling some things out , I came to know, it is celebrated because the Constituent Assembly of India had adopted Hindi written in Devnagari script as the Official Language of the Union on 14th September 1949. Most of occasions/festivals/ or any ‘divas’ doesn’t matter to people like me unless it is a chhutti at work!! ;) But this time, it somehow touched me, may be a little patriotism had shoot in me for ‘Hindustan’s national language Hindi’.

I belong to Punjab, called ‘Punjabi kudi’ by a couple of friends. Still the use of Punjabi was not much in my conversation at school or family or college. I used to speak either Hindi or English. It’s still the same when I am working here in NCR. I remember in school, we were prompted to speak English in all the classes except the ‘Hindi’ and ‘Punjabi’ class. In them, we had to speak that language only. Yes, English was promoted majorly and still is, coz we need to converse in that language globally. But, somewhere, the ‘National Language’ and the ‘Mother Tongue’ of quite a few of us has been lost somewhere.

You won’t believe, when I changed my Language Settings in FB from ‘English(US)’ to ‘Hindi’, I was finding it real hard to read. I am sure I was able to go to my wall and profile etc., coz I am familiar with the normal designing  and 'look and feel' of FB. I even changed back my settings from Hindi to English with a little difficulty. If I wanted to read and go to that particular link in Hindi, I was truly failing. Moreover, when I was on this Hindi FB Page, I even felt like translating it to English with google translator. I was even laughing that I could not understand what is written. Was I laughing at FB in Hindi? Or was it me? My failure to read the language which I actually studied for more than 10 years of my life?

I am really not promoting to speak shudh hindi. It’s just that I myself do not want to forget it. I truly want to be proud when I speak or read it. I hope all of us feel that way.

Ciao.. Keep Smiling.. !!